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My One Word for 2015: Grace

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To be honest, 2014 was nothing like I expected… or wanted. Since January of this year we have been through one thing after another trying to help our daughter with her complicated medical conditions. From being diagnosed with Failure to Thrive, Lyrangomalsia, Aspiration and Apnea, to surgery, a feeding tube, and 7 hospital stays, my daughter’s short life has been one of many trials and complications.

My word for 2014 was supposed to be “relationship.” I stated that I wanted to work on my relationship with God, my husband, my family and my friends, but as I look over the past year to where I am today, I don’t see much growth in these areas.

Over the past year, I have been in a spot where I am struggling to see where I am with God. I grieve for everything that has happened to my family and it’s been very hard for me to see past that. The relationship with our families has been touch and go. Some relationships have grown stronger, others have backed away.

My relationship with friends? There hasn’t been much growth on my part which saddens me. Gone are the days of play dates and girl’s nights out. Most of my time has been filled with therapies, appointments, and exhaustion.

Grace
Lily | dollarphotoclub.com

As I sit here tonight, thinking about everything from the past year the thing I see most is the word God gave me for 2015: grace. If there was anything our little family needs more this coming year it’s grace. If there is any lesson that I need to learn it’s that God always gives grace.

Wikipedia defines grace as:

The love and mercy given to us by God because God desires us to have it, not because of anything we have done to earn it.”

I may not have grown in my relationships like I wanted to, I may not know right now what is up from down or black from white, but there is grace and I am so thankful.

My family will be heading into 2015 at full speed. We have lab results to get back, surgeries to schedule, new specialists to see, and we are heading to a new base that will hopefully give us a new start.

In 2015, I will need God’s grace to cover my fears. I will need God’s grace for the days I try to take things into my own hands and control everything that happens. I will need God’s grace for the days I just can’t take the exhaustion one more minute. I will need God’s grace for the days my husband and I just can’t agree on things.

I don’t now what else will come in 2015, but I do know God’s grace will be with me. I pray that it’s the same for you.

What word did you choose for 2015? 

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14 Comments

  1. Dealing with illness is so hard…I know, because I’m the one in my family who’s sick, and I’ve seen the toll it takes on my wife.

    Added to the sorrow and the care required is the way I deal with it, because we’re very different. I worked as a paramiltary, and maintained the physical and mental protocols the job demanded. Self-care, for me, is pushing harder.

    My word is Hirihokenten, the motto adopted by Masashige Kusunoki, who died by his own hand after the Battle of the Minato River (Minatogawa) in 1366, and is still revered in Japan.

    It means “it is important to contemplate debt, but unimportant to consider death”.

    The best Western translation would be that duty is everything, and trumps even self=preservation. If I’m around for 2016, I’ll probably hang onto Hirihokenten. I kind of like it.

    Thank you for keeping this blog running, in spite of the difficult times you’ve had.

    1. Hi Andrew,
      Thank you so much for commenting. I am so sorry it’s been hard for you all. I can only imagine the toll it takes because like you said, dealing with illness it so hard. I pray that God give you all the grace you need to get through 2015.

      I think your word is amazing and very unique. I hope that 2015 is a year that surprised you all in how good it is. Good luck and thanks again for your kinds words!

    1. Grace is a great word! Paul Tripp writes a lot about grace. My word is trust. I have had to learn to trust God in deeper ways last year and its carrying over into 2015. I want to learn to trust Him more and not allow fear to take over. Grace to you…

      1. Amy,
        I love Paul Tripp! I need to find more time to read more from him. I love that you picked “trust” as your word. Trust was my 2012 word and I needed it in similar ways (https://singingthroughtherain.net/2012/01/my-2012-word-trust.html). I pray that you find everything you need in 2015!

        My verse for when I need to trust, thought I’d share: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on thy own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy paths.” – Proverbs 3:5,6

  2. My word for 2015 is pursue. I’m looking at it as a call to pursue God more and a reminder that He is a relentless lover who pursues me constantly. I pray that 2015 will be a blessing for you and your family.
    God Bless – Kimberley
    peculiartreasuresblog.com

    1. Kimberly, I absolutely LOVE this. Such a great reminder for me as well, I am so glad you shared! Thank you and happy New Year to you!

      P.S. – I’m a new follower on your Twitter! 🙂

  3. Thank you for finding my blog earlier today. I have a lump in my throat when I read your story – it feels so familiar. I know the loneliness and the struggles of juggling appointments, kids and trying not to lose yourself and your sanity in the process. I just wanted to reach out and wish you the best 2015 possible! Stay strong, mama – you sound amazing – and I will be sure to follow your social media.

    1. Hi!
      I actually have been a reader of your blog for awhile, I just haven’t had a lot of time to comment in the past, but I have shared a lot of your posts. Thank you so much for reaching out, your posts have been encouraging to me, and it’s nice to know I’m not alone. Thank you and good luck as well!

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